transformation

Letting go can be hard. But hanging on when indications are telling us it is time for change creates stress that may lead to anxiousness or depression. There can be fear associated with letting go, perhaps fear of the unknown.

Scripture tells us that we “live, move, and have our being” in the Divine. Believing this can be difficult when we look at the world around us. This is where cultivating faith comes in. But where do we find faith if we don’t feel like we have any or what we have doesn’t feel strong?

There is the spiritual concept of the Seed. The Seed can be understood as that part of our being that is the Divine within. Relationship with the Divine is invitational and is continually being offered to us. To develop the relationship requires a response from us. This can be compared with the sprouting of the seed and the subsequent growth of our awareness of the Divine. Once aware, how can we get to know God?

The spiritual way of living that is the basis of 12 Step recovery offers a way to develop this relationship. Early in the Steps we encounter Step Three, which is, “Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.” This can be scary, but many of us found ourselves at a place in our lives where our way was not working. Considering the “bottom” we had hit, the seeming uncertainty of trusting God looked better than the certain internal hell we found ourselves in. The decision made in Step Three puts us at a gate. If we walk through and work Steps Four through Nine, we will find that we are in a conscious relationship with the Divine. We will no longer have the same fear of letting go because we will know the faithfulness of the Divine. Continuing with Steps Ten, Eleven and Twelve, we build upon this foundation while improving our relationship with God and the world around us.

In whatever way one comes to be in relationship with the Divine, eventually, through experience, many realize that there is more to life than can be explained scientifically. These experiences are personal and subjective. Time and time again, often in small group settings, we hear people share their experiences of sensing and knowing that God is working in their lives. To borrow from the Big Book, they say that “God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.” If you are struggling with any area of your life, I believe that you, too, can experience the power of the Divine in you life. Is it time to let go and let God?

I thank God for the water lilies on the lake. Nature is such a wise and wonderful teacher. When we are aware of Divine Love within and around us, we appreciate the present moment and trust that this experience is producing the seeds for a beautiful tomorrow. I pray that reading this is one such moment for you. Daniel+

[The Big Book is the book Alcoholics Anonymous. The Twelve Steps are the steps used in recovery from addiction first described in the book Alcoholics Anonymous and adopted by other 12 Step groups.]

Dr. Carl Jung once told a desperate man that, occasionally, some individuals were able to recover from the hopeless state of addiction to alcohol that this man was suffering from. In this story, we hear how Dr. Jung explained to this man that recovery from an alcoholic condition such as his did occur and that it usually involved, “…huge emotional displacements and rearrangements.”[1] He told him that, “Ideas, emotions, and attitudes which were once the guiding forces,” in the person are “suddenly cast to one side, and a completely new set of conceptions and motives begin to dominate them.” For this man, that did happen. Soon afterward, he passed on what he had learned to Bill Wilson, who eventually passed it on to Dr. Bob Smith, leading to the beginning of Alcoholics Anonymous.

The experiences of the early members of AA showed that for many individuals, this psychic change did not occur in a single “sudden” transformative event. They found that it usually occurred over some time, and we refer to this as a spiritual awakening. In 12 Step meetings, it is common for individuals to share their experiences and wisdom regarding this crucial facet of recovery from addiction.

On a Sunday during the Covid-19 pandemic of 2020, I participated in an online worship service with about twenty-five participant screens showing on the computer. Activity on one participant’s video feed caught my attention. This is what I saw: Four-year-old Kevin (both names are changed) walks over to his mother Maggie who is sitting in front of her computer. He stands beside her and looks up as he leans his shoulder against her. Maggie responds, gently bending over him like a tree in a soft wind. They are fully connected as their eyes gaze deeply into each other, their smiles expressions of pure joy. In that moment nothing else exists for them. Maggie continues to smile as words flow to Kevin. His smile grows as he coyly turns his head away, evidence of receiving a delightful message.

As I watched this blessed interaction between mother and child, I recognized that what I witnessed was an example of how God loves me. Perhaps many can say that they have had a similar experience—I have. But this awareness was more significant than I can express and went deep, filling a place that I had not been fully conscious. In that moment, I knew that God continuously loves me the way Maggie loves Kevin. What is more, I knew that this love, the complete and unconditional love of God for me, is all that I need and that I do not have to seek it from anyone. But I also had a strong sense that I must give this love to others, everyone, in fact.

In a minute or two, the scene on the screen changed as the service progressed. I knew that I had just had a spiritual experience and that this experience had changed me. “Emotional displacements and rearrangements” occurred, and a psycho-spiritual problem resolved. Today, I am different because of this experience.

I have had other such experiences, but I cannot say that there has been any one that stands out as the spiritual experience that changed my life. They have all changed my life in some way. The way I see it is that within the mix of my life, which is a process of spiritual awakening, spiritual experiences occur that are acts of Grace that are specific to my condition. Spiritual experiences and spiritual awakening are part of the recipe. They are blended in such a way that, though they have distinguishing characteristics, they are part of the batter and are not separable, just as am I not separable from them or the Divine. When we live our lives using the “simple kit of spiritual tools laid at our feet,” we will come to know this. Then, like those who helped pen the Big Book, we can say that “We have found much of heaven and we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of existence of which we had not even dreamed.”

I often hear recovered alcoholics and addicts say that they are glad that they went through what they did. Their experiences brought them to the 12 Steps and the better life that results. One does not have to be an addict to use the 12 Steps. The 12 Steps are a set of spiritual principles and instructions on how to put them into practical use. One way to look at it is that Holy Scripture tells us what we need to live loving and purposeful lives, and the 12 Steps show us how. When we live a God-centered, God-led life, we find that the things we stand to lose are things that we don’t want anyway. The things we gain are what gives joy, purpose, and satisfaction.

“Vital spiritual experiences,” necessary for recovery from addictions, can be experienced by anyone. A transformation happens that, in turn, leads to loving service to others. This awareness of God that becomes the center of one’s life is available to any person who incorporates the simple spiritual principles used in AA into their daily living.

[1] Anon, Alcoholics Anonymous: Third Edition, Thirty-second Printing edition (Alcoholics Anonymous, 1976., 1976). All quotes are found on pp 25, 27.

Letting Go

Spiritual Experiences Within Spiritual Awakening